Thursday, October 16, 2014

Knowing God (not just knowing more).



In an ongoing quest for transparency (or perhaps just accountability?), the following is an unedited homework excerpt from Week 3 in my recent Spiritual Formation class.

I hope to continue to learn from this airing of dirty laundry, this thinking out loud (or on paper, or on the internet, or whatever). Whew...deep breath. Here goes.

Describe one of the familiar disciplines in the weekly reading and why it has been meaningful or helpful to your spiritual life: 
I love intercessory prayer, even though I don’t always feel as if I do it well. It gives me a way to connect with and invest in friendships and spiritual relationships in new and deeper ways...to say “I’ll pray for you” -or even better, “I’ve been praying for you”- and to mean it, and to have my friends (and especially the college students and young adults that we minister to) know that I mean it. It’s beautiful.

Note: I want to do this more. A lot more.

Describe one of the new or unfamiliar discipline in the weekly reading and why you might try to implement it in your life and ministry in the future:
I’ll be honest, Devotional Reading is not 100% new to me, but I really, really resonated with the accompanying quotation (as both a student and a teacher):

"Our desire to know more, read more and study more can be another expression of our culture and its acquisitive nature. Knowing God, not knowing more, is the goal." -Ronald Rolheiser

I’m not always great at this, but it’s what I want. Or at least it’s what I want to want!


Note: I sometimes -okay often- struggle with letting my desire to know and read and study and do more get in the way of knowing God and others more. I know, I know...I'm working on it! It's a process (and one I kinda suck at). 

Describe one of the disciplines from the weekly reading that you would have trouble practicing and describe why this would be:
I really struggle with the idea of fasting, particularly how it’s sometimes presented in the context of Lent. Giving things up tends to make me disgruntled rather than more spiritually focused!

Having said that, I also feel like intentional simplicity is a fundamental, bedrock principle for Christian spirituality, so...it’s possible I’m just hung up on myself. :) So perhaps the answer isn’t food, but rather the internet or television or...something. I feel like there’s undiscovered worth here yet!

Note: I'm officially looking for ways to simplify my life in ways that free up more time, money, and energy to invest in more Jesus-y ways. Suggestions are always welcome! 

Friday, September 26, 2014

Keeping Company with Jesus


"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest.

Walk with me and work with me--watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.  I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly" -Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)

I believe the desire for a different sort of life doesn't appear out of thin air. The longing for something more, no matter how weak or crackling with heat, is evidence that God is already at work in your life. 

You wouldn't want more of God if the Holy Spirit wasn't first seeking you. It is the Trinity's action within that fans the small flame of desire motivating us to "keep company" with Jesus. 

In fact, the very desire or desperation you feel can be God's way of readying you to walk and work with Jesus. Take heart, transformation happens as you keep company with Jesus. -Adele Ahlberg Calhoun, Spiritual Disciplines Handbook


Friday, September 19, 2014

I need a new plan.





So I'm taking a theology class for ordination on spiritual formation. 

For those of you who know me well, you can understand how excited I am about this. :) A class about spiritual disciplines, and practice, and church history, and who we say we are? Sign me up!!

If only it wasn't happening during a very busy semester of teaching, tutoring, and college/young adult ministry.

Except maybe that's the whole point.

So...as an exercise in honesty (and accountability), some of my Week 2 homework is included below for your perusal, edification, and/or amusement.

Describe one of the familiar disciplines in the weekly reading and why it has been meaningful or helpful to your spiritual life:


Journaling: I love journaling as a prayer practice...doesn’t really do much for me otherwise, but there you are. It keeps me mindful and present in my prayer time, because it forces to slow down and think (at least) to the speed of my handwriting. And it’s (sometimes) a pretty cool record of how God has been active in our lives over the weeks/months/years. :) Other times it’s so painful you have to burn the thing and start over!

Describe one of the new or unfamiliar discipline in the weekly reading and why you might try to implement it in your life and ministry in the future:


Practicing the Presence: I’ll be honest...I’ve never even heard of this before (at least not articulated in this way). But I like the idea of maintaining “an ongoing conversation with God no matter what [I’m] doing!” :) I love the idea of looking for God in the seemingly mundane...in apparently trial conversations and interactions...in the beauty of nature and little, daily blessings. I suspect it would change a lot about my “default setting,” too. :)

Describe one of the disciplines from the weekly reading that you would have trouble practicing and describe why this would be:

Rest: I suck at resting. I’m terrible at it. Simply awful. I know it’s a good idea, but I continue to put it off for what sound a lot like good things (but maybe not the best thing?)...for the endless piles of stuff that I also feel called to, and whose call I sometimes heed out of all proportion to their long-term importance. I keep telling myself “next semester will be better” or “things will finally start to settle when___” and it just. doesn’t. work.

I need a new plan.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Human terms.


Somewhere along the way,
I stopped referring to God
as "he" and "him"
in limited, human terms.

I'm not sure I could tell you
precisely where or when.
But it feels bigger,
loving, and sure.

Thursday, July 17, 2014

"Fairy-Stories": Tolkien, Lewis, and God


I (Aaron) have been reading Collin Durietz's recent biography of J. R. R. Tolkien in my (scant) free time lately.

I find Tolkien fascinating for all kinds of reasons: he's one of my all-time favourite fiction authors, but he was also a WWI veteran (it changed his writing forever), brilliant scholar (he studied and taught at Oxford), and strong moral influence on C. S. Lewis (one of my all-time favourite fiction AND non-fiction writers)!

I loved the biographer's description of Tolkien's reasons for writing "fairy stories" and the ways he hoped they would shape his readers:

In addition to offering a Secondary World, with an "inner consistency of reality," a good fair tale in Tolkien's view has three other key features. 

First, it helps to bring about in the reader what he calls recovery - that is, the restoration of a true view of the meaning of ordinary and humble things that make up human life and reality: things like love, thought, trees, hills, and food. 

This is so beautiful, and so true. Who hasn't felt a longing for the pastoral, rustic simplicity of the Shire? Or longed to spend a rainy afternoon in The Prancing Pony? Or thrilled at the sight of the Misty Mountains? I could go on and on...

Composer Howard Shore's ability to capture and articulate these longings, by the way, are the chief reason that the Lord of the Rings soundtracks rank among the best cinematic scores of all time.

Secondly, the good fairy story offers escape from one's narrow and distorted view of reality and meaning. 

I think this is true as well, although perhaps even more so in Lewis' writing than Tolkien's. Maybe there is something to allegory after all, loathe though Tolkien would have been to admit it! See: the hopeful Universalism of Aslan's conversation with the Calormene soldier toward the end of The Last Battle.

Thirdly, the good fairy story offers consolation, leading to joy.

This is perfect, and brilliant, and true. Tolkien knew it. His fondness for sudden, positive, seemingly impossible developments -what he referred to as eucatastrophe, or "hope unlooked-for"- is what makes the books (and the films).

It's Gandalf turning up at Helm's Deep at dawn; it's Rohan's arrival on the field of Battle outside Minas Tirith; it's the consummation of Arwen and Aragorn's seemingly impossible romance; and it's the success of Sam & Frodo's tortuous, unlikely journey.

In many ways, these three things -recovery, escape, and consolation- are why we keep reading, hoping, and believing. It's true of all good writing: sacred or secular, fiction or non-fiction.

I think it's also true of the story of God's sweeping, inclusive, prodigal love for us.

"And that," as Tolkien might say, "may be an encouraging thought." :) Amen! 

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

The Person who Prays.


True prayer begins with God who moves our spirit as the Gospel song tells us, to seek [God] seeking us...

Through our prayers [God] reveals that [God's] will is wholly Love, and that our response to that will must be love as well. Even our love for God draws its energy from the source of Love itself, which is God...

The person who continually prays finds his or her life transformed from one of "knowing" to one of believing, and from one ruled by the many selves to one lived according to God's will, which is Love...

The person who prays discovers that the deepest self is clay which must be shaped, molded, and fired by Love. This God-created entity is what Christian tradition calls the soul.

The starting point for prayer is to place the self in the hands of God...This is the clay's surrender to the potter, the surrender of the vanquished to the conqueror as yet unseen, and the lover's surrender to the beloved hidden behind the veil.

Russell M. Hart, Crossing the Border

Saints


The church and the world need saints. 

They need saints more than they need canny politicians, more brilliant scientists, more grossly overpaid executives and entrepreneurs, more clever entertainers and talk-show hosts...

Those whose lives have been irradiated by God's grace, who seek not to be safe but to be faithful, who have learned how to get along in adversity, who are joyful, who are dream filled, and above all, who are prayerful. 

That is what the church and the world need most. 

It begins with you. 

E. Glenn Hinson
Spiritual Preparation for Christian Leadership